Is this new or new normal!?

Delicious new normal, strawberry cream cheese braid

I get hung up on trivial details sometimes.  Detail such as what does new normal feel like? 

I have a thought what my new normal may be:  it is doing everything I used to normally do with Eric, only now without him.  It may not be an epiphany, but it is helpful to acknowledge that. 

I would not normally travel to visit Eric's friends by myself.  If I were to do that now and visit Alex and Mike and Kathy in Pocatello, ID, it is not a "new normal."  It is just new.  

Examples of my new normal would be tending to the vegetable garden by myself - weeding, preparing the soil, sowing seeds, watering, etc.  Another new normal would be practicing archery or going to the gun range by myself.  Yet another would be cooking for two instead of three on any given day.  One of the truest new normals would mean sleeping through the night with the right side of my bed empty.  

It appears there are many new normals, not just one.  

I established couple new normals this week:  I smothered weeds.  They have grown out of control in my garden; a small part of this new normal is due to not wanting to feel like I live in an abandoned home.  A much bigger part is my desire to keep our tradition of planting our veggies garden.  

Everywhere I turned, crab-grass pulled, seed packet sowed, Eric was there.  It comforted me yet saddened me, for obvious reasons.  I worked on each patch meticulously, quietly, methodically, enjoying my husband's presence.  Then I stepped back and appreciated the fruit of my manual labor.  I long for solitude in the garden.  My time with the soil, with the weeds, with Eric.  

Some of my new normals have sprouted.  After all, it is spring.  Let them grow. 

Eric would work on the patch meticulously and
get it ready for the carrots.  I would then sow the seeds.   

Following that tradition, I pulled all the weeds, and
sifted the rocks from the soil.  Some traditions
are worth following.  

This is one of many reasons manual labor
is good for the soul, not to mention
taste buds.
(picture from July, 2011)

Invasive fruitless strawberries are pulled from
the prized raspberries.  Nature will do her part now.  

 

a delicious new normal just got more delicious